Pimp My Run

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   in loving memory of Ah Meng the Safari Zoo Run 09

   

   Feb 9, ‘09 2:27 PM
   for Mey’s contacts

   Singapore Zoo 8 Feb 2009, a 6.4km Run

   

   I swear to god! I don’t curse and swear as much, my entire life, right until the day I met her at the funeral. Keterlaluan…this is getting way too much!!!

   Bila si perempun yg sepanjang hayatya tiada lain, melainkan bertukar tukar pasangan, buat anak, makan di hiding, mandi di gosokkan, tidor di dodoikan, dan berpeluang mendampingi para celebrati dari seluruh dunia…dlm otak aku berkata…keterlaluan!! Chisssttt!! Bedebah punya perempuan!!!

   Dan ketika si perempuan ini mati…dia di tangisi lebih 4000 orang. Ribuan yang lain, mungkin juga, jutaan manusia lain menangisi kematian nya, termasuk diri aku….

   Dan kuburan nya…wahhhhh!! Tempat yg hebat!!,tercantik di dlm perkarang Singapore zoo, berhadapan dengan tasik, di keliling bunga bunga, sunflowers, yg beraneka warna.

   Wahhhh!! Alang kah seronok nya menjadi se ekor Ah Meng!! Pembesar Negara pun belum tentu mendapat tempat ‘istirehat’ seindah kuburan Ah Meng.

   Lucky bitch! That’s all I can say.

   I know…I sounded crude, but that is exactly how I feel.

   I can’t help thinking, and at certain point, I was amazed with myself, when I put in too much thought about old lady Ah Meng pounding her mates.

   She died at the age of 48, on Feb 8, 2008. an age equivalent to 95orangutan years…

   Lucky bitch that Ah Meng! I can’t help thinking what a bitch she was. All her life, she did nothing, except changing life partners, and they all happened to be younger than her, mating, expending her families, built name for herself, meeting top celebrities and all…having breakfast while whole world is watching her…

   She damned lucky bitch! that Ah Meng!

   I think any women will be jealous of her. And any women who said otherwise, is the greatest, biggest liar on earth.

   I kept thinking, about Ah Meng mating all her lifetime in the Singapore zoo compound, raising her family, giving births, mating entire season, seeing the arrival of her 1^st grandson, and all that… while I pounded my feet on the 6.5km zoo trail, running, for what I have forgotten for, and all those time, I kept thinking about Ah Meng, making it in the zoo compound. And here I am…running, in her memory, marking 1^st year of her death. How crude can I be? You know how depressed that thought can be?

   No you don’t I don’t think anyone knows..hahahahhaha.

   The 6.5km trail was amazingly difficult to begin with. The 1^stkm we ran uphill. Many have to slow down, and catch a breather, I was like almost semput, and have wanted to stop, but I kept telling myself ‘what goes up must come down! you’re going downhill pretty soon! True to that point, after a 1km narrow bend, we started going downhill.

   It was fun, breezy downhill. The afternoon sun was no where near my face, it was like running in a rainforest somewhere in Sumatra. Amazing. The Singapore zoo is really amazing *promoting the Zoo* heheheh.

   The first 3.5km trails cover the area of the Night Safari, with many small hills and narrow bent. But it was worth it. I kept looking at the sign. I didn’t concentrate too much on finishing the run. At one point, I saw this sign that said ‘tiger’ sponsored by tiger balm. I can’t help, but to giggle when I was near the spot where the ‘babihutan’ signed was located. In my mind, I kept seeing the faces of these three morons pounding each other, doing threesomes, and I was eager to see, which company is sponsoring this ‘babihutan’. It turns out to be some individual from France with name that sounded like ‘papi sumthing…kahakhakahkahkah!!

   I had my first drink at 2km marking. By then, I was fully drenched in my own sweat. As I gulped down the drink, I help myself further, by reading on the bottle. New Water. Sponsored by PUB. I don’t belief that I actually drink, as in really gulping down the New Water. Damned! The New Water is sweeter than and not as bad as what I thought it would be.

   The final leg of 3km trails, was in the Singapore zoo compound itself. By this time, it was crowded and jammed pack with visitors. I was having difficulty marking the ground, cause too may people and I was also having trouble distinguishing the animals and humans. They all become one. I don’t believe myself, and again, I imagine everyone, the people, the animals are doing the animal planet midnight series kind of thing. What is wrong with me! Gosh! It must be the spirit of old lady Ah Meng getting into me!

   I made a quite regular sprint, and the next thing I realized, everyone was shouting…go.go..go.! you almost there..go go go!! And there I was, panting, wet to the max. touching the finish line. Time checked 4.48pm! I did it in just 48mins.

   Not my best time, but am getting there alright.

   p.s

   Please everyone who reads this blog. I beg you! Not to report me to the zoo authority.

   I don’t mean to insult the old lady Ah Meng. She’s one lucky bitch, if you know what I meant. She resting in peace opposite the Piearce Reservoir, her grave is the most beautiful, I’ve ever seen. And no human will ever get that honor, not even the ministers of Singapore. Trust me. She’s one lucky bitch!

   Any one, wants to go to the Night Safari, do let me know. I get 50% off entrance fee upon presenting my runner’s bib. Offer last till end Feb 09.

   

    (old lady Ah Meng off spring, Satria, Sayang & Riau)

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